I feel like I need to be honest here… I find something intriguing about Matthew McConaughey’s 2000 era. The movies are all generally bad, but the fact that this guy somehow pivots into the McConaugh-ssaince from 2010-2020 is insane. He went through a decade of just horrible films, only to come out the other side as one of the most dominant in the business.
All that being said, at the time of writing this, it is about 11 PM, and I should just go to bed. However, I’ve found “Failure to Launch” on Netflix, and it just seems like a good idea to spend the next hour-and-a-half watching what is most certainly not-great comedy. Anyway, lets do this thing…. Here is the trailer.
3 minutes later… Yup, this movie is gonna be live blogged because i want to spend no more time on this than I have to. Matthew McConaughey is a horrible person already in this one. He’s gotta be what, 40? And still living with his parents so he can use them to avoid breaking up with women?
Also, 2 of the Hangover Wolfpack are in this movie. Of course, one of those is the boring one but i still want to see the crossover film.
7 minutes later… Remember when Sarah Jessica Parker was a thing? I don’t, but I’m not in the “Sex and the City” target demo. Apparently in this one she plays a specialist who convinces men to move out of their parents homes by emotionally manipulating them to fall in love with her. So she is a horrible person too. And McConaughey’s parents are paying her for the service, making them horrible people as well… Who are we rooting for in this one?
20 minutes in… This movie definitely has the “Grown UPS” complex to it, in that the leads just really wanted to make a movie where they could do fun stuff like mountain biking and playing video games.
I dont know what is happening… The two leads are dating, they have no zero chemistry, and SJP keeps making quips that someone clearly thought was clever.
10 hours later… I wish i were making a joke here, but I fell asleep. So I’ve got another hour or so of this awful movie without the benefit of fighting sleep to pass the time. Ugh, so here we go again…
Paintball with the Wolfpack. How much better would the Hangover have been with Matthew McConaughey? Actually, probably not, but all this movie does is really make me want to watch that. Another movie this makes me remember is “Wedding Crashers”. Think about it, but in reverse… SJP knows all the “tricks” to make a guy fall for her, so she emotionally manipulates him to get what she wants.
AND now we just got to the obligatory 2000’s era McConaughey surfing scene. I haven’t seen all of his films from the era, but I feel like a lot of what I have seen includes one. In this one, he just got bit by a dolphin. I don’t really know why this scene is in the movie, but it seems pretty dumb. Maybe it was an excuse for the studio to pay for a trip to the beach; if that is the case, good on them.
Minute 47 / 95 – Ohmigod, i cant do this. This movie is horrible, and I refuse to finish it.
The fact that Matthew McConaughey has any career in 2020 is a testament to his ability to adapt as an actor and pick some good films, because in 2006 he definitely didn’t have that talent. I have seen nothing else with Sarah Jessica Parker, so someone else will need to tell me if this movie is a good representation of her acting ability. My guess is yes, since the only place I’ve seen her is in marketing for the “Sex and the City” films.
So, before I wrap this one up, let me try and figure out what the market for this movie is… It feels sexist to just say “its a chick-flick”, because there is almost no plot to this and I’d like to think that good film tastes are not discriminatory by gender. HOWEVER, there are definitely plotless action movies that I am very high on (“Crank”, “Shoot ‘em Up”, the “Fast & Furious” franchise). Perhaps this movie of generic romantic comedy tropes is something some people might get a kick out of.
Final wrap up… It’s not fair to try and grade this one out, because I didn’t have the fortitude to finish it (which says a lot on its own). This movie is not enjoyable, the leads don’t have any chemistry, and the story is nonsense. Perhaps it works as a date night movie, but only because it might lead to you and your date trying to distract yourself with… other activities.
I’m not spending any more time on this POS than i have to… Peace.
Ain't That Bad - Movie Blog 