Merry Christmas, everyone! 2020 has been a rough year for movies, with most of the big releases getting pushed back. But due to this rough year for movies and theaters, HBO Max obtained the rights to stream the new Wonder Woman for the first 31 days after release! For guys like me who generally don’t like watching movies in a crowded theater, this actually is more convenient, but I completely understand the thought that this is bad for the industry. Honestly, I think if movies stop being released in theaters, we will no longer see the big budget tentpoles, so clearly something will give; either theaters will make a comeback or movie budgets will take the hit. Anyway, I digress… Let’s talk Wonder Woman.
I’ve never been a huge fan of Wonder Woman as a character, basically because I never really “got” her backstory. Basically, she is a descendent of Greek gods, but lives on an island of women and is known as an “Amazon”. It’s a lot of gobbledegook to me, but that aside, I really enjoyed the previous film. I thought it was the right mix of historically grounded action and enjoyable power-fantasy; it definitely is in the conversation for “best DC movie not directed by Christopher Nolan”. I think Gal Gadot is great in the role, and it is another layer of awesome that the filmmakers decided to give the Amazon’s accents because Gal Gadot couldn’t lose hers. I want to watch and blog about that one later, but just know that I think its great. (Also, her BvS part is great, but that’s beside the point.)
So, with all of that said, I have to say… I am really disappointed with this sequel. For all the humor, action, and spirit present in the first one, Wonder Woman 1984 is fairly boring, overlong, and lackluster. In the first film, Diana is unfamiliar with the modern world, blissfully unaware of how people work off of her island. She was filled with the hopeful exuberance of a teenager, hoping to make an impact in the world. In this one, she has essentially become complacent, surviving in the world but not really participating in it. And that lack of wonder, that lack of a need to learn about the world really makes her a boring character.
It also really doesn’t help that it takes a LONG time for any serious superhero action to take place. Sure, the first 10 minutes is a flashback to Amazon Island, the next 10 is the obligatory quick cut between different instances of WW saving people around Washington DC, but after that we sit through conversations with Kristen Wiig, a party scene with Pedro Pascal, a hookup between Wiig and Pascal, and a bunch of talk about a magic wish-granting stone. During that hour-plus segment of the film, Steve Trevor is resurrected, we go through what essentially is a half-effort recreation of “learning about the world” from the first movie, just with Steve and Diana’s roles swapped. There is definitely some good content in here, but it seems like far more than is necessary. It makes the film drag.
If we talk about the plot, unfortunately that doesn’t make a lot of sense either. Basically, the magic wish-granting stone gives WW back Steve Trevor and Kristin Wiig superpowers. Then, immediately after that, we talk about the aforementioned Pedro Pascal-Kristin Wiig hookup scene where Pascal steals the stone and wishes to “be” the stone himself. Basically, that means that people shake his hands and wish for things, and they end up getting them but with drastic side effects; essentially, Pascall is a living monkey’s paw.
And honestly, that is where this film loses me. A magic wish-granting entity with vague restrictions/rules means that anything can happen, and everything just seems entirely plot-serving. The stone will do whatever is necessary to force the plot points the script calls for, which can work for an enjoyable superhero movie, but the script isn’t really exciting enough for it to work here. There are essentially 4 underwhelming action sequences, and the big-CGI fight between Wonder Woman and Cheetah looks shabby. So we have a somewhat ludicrous plot, paired with fairly underwhelming action sequences, accentuated with shabby CGI.
Those are the biggies, but there are a few other annoying factors in this movie that beg to be called out… Wonder Woman has this “super armor”, left by an Amazon who has been lost to the world for centuries. She dons the super armor for the final fight, but it doesn’t really add much; it seems like this was just a “wardrobe change” so that they could sell some more action figures. Then, we see a mid-credits sequence with this Amazon that turns out to be Linda Carter; which means they set up a good story for the three-quel in the main film only to waste it on a hat-tip to the original Wonder Woman from the 1980s. We know she isn’t going to be in #3, because Carter is very clearly is too old to do action sequences; she had at least an inch of makeup on for the single shot in this movie, and a google search ages her at almost 70. So an intriguing set-up was wasted on a cameo.
I REALLY wanted to like this movie. In a crappy year, essentially a summer tent pole film airing on a streaming service that I subscribe to ( and a DC property no less), this was going to be a high point of my holiday. Instead, I was treated to a film that seemed almost rushed, with a plot that was both boring and difficult to understand and action sequences that don’t measure up to the original. There is not a lot to stream right now so I have a hard time telling people not to watch this, but at best it is a mediocre film. It probably doesn’t hurt DC’s credibility, but it doesn’t bring nearly the impact of the original to the brand.
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